guess who's coming to dinner...in february

I'll cut to the chase and just type it. I'm pregnant. I can already hear the gasps in both surprise and ill-concealed disgust. I'm sure people have questions. Here are some answers.

Inquiring Minds: This pregnancy... was it planned or a surprise? Me: Freakishly enough it was planned. I even willingly made the appointment to have my iud removed. Even better? I tracked my periods and recorded my basal temp for 4 months! How's that for attention span? IM: Aren't 2 enough!?!? Me: Apparently not. IM: Okay. Forget about overpopulating the Earth, what about your age? Aren't you close to 50 already? Me: I'll have you know I'm just as close to 20 as I am to 50. Okay. Maybe that's not true since I'm on the downhill side of 35. But still, celebrities have babies at their advanced ages every day (okay, so not the Spears but didn't Halle Berry have a baby recently?). IM: What are you thinking? You were completely in the clear. Both in school, no diapers, everybody wipes their own ass. WTF?!? Me: I'd been getting so much undisturbed sleep since moving to Tucson, I figured I needed to inject some excitment into our lives. IM: Can you afford this? Me: Theoretically, no. Realistically, sure. It'll be fabulous. And no MJ, we won't have to sell the house or borrow cashola from you. IM: Is this Mitchell's last ditch effort for a boy? Me: Perhaps. As usual, he hasn't been super-specific about the brand of baby he'd like. He just seems happy that I agreed to a third. IM: Not that you don't deserve whatever comes your way since you got yourself into this, but how're you feeling? Me: Awesome! Similar to T's first trimester, I'm desperately ill. In a typical day, I'll puke 8 to 12 times. I have a headache most days and want to sleep constantly. The girls, of course, have other plans... IM: Hey yeah, what about the girls? How do they feel about this? Me: They are ridiculously excited. They're constantly trying to feed me and bring me drinks and kissing my stomach. DeeDee's especially thrilled to take a turn as a big sister. T's planning to babysit.