15 minutes

The dude who runs the boot camp I attend in the mornings has published some uber flattering pics of me (and others). Check them out by clicking here. Please note: I am wearing black shorts NOT salmon pink sweats...Don't get it twisted.

new diet plan

I have stumbled upon the best diet on earth. It's called The First Trimester Pregnancy Diet. It's super easy. All you've got to do is get impregnated. That where your work ends. There's no calorie counting, portion control, nada. About 4 weeks into it, your diet plan kicks in. You will no longer be able to consume dairy, most meats, sugar or just about anything else depending upon the day without violent vomiting and yes, even sometimes, diarrhea. It's truly amazing. Granted you will have to cope with almost constant nausea, but it's completely worth the 10 plus pounds you're likely to drop in a flash. And get this people, it happens with absolutely NO physical exercise. More than likely, you'll be required to increase your sitting on your ass and nap time exponentially because you'll have NO energy to do anything else. The downside, of course, is the fact that as you move out of your 1st trimester your urge to purge will be greatly reduced, and you'll most likely gain 25 to 50 lbs. Oh. That and the fact that your ob really frowns upon losing weight while pregnant and will even threaten to hospitalize you if you can't get it together.