he looks good

Be forewarned. This is something of a rant.... I H-A-T-E it when people feel the need to tell me that Mitchell "looks good". It infuriates me. He looks good so everything must be okay. He looks good so I'm sure things aren't that bad/difficult/shitty/whatever. First of all, he has had this cancer for the last 5 years (at the very least). So the way he looked before we discovered he has cancer may not be the best measure for looking good. Second, HE'S FUCKING GREY! Am I really the only person that sees this? His hands and feet (you know the part that's supposed to be light?)...his are a weird charcoal color. And the skin is peeling and flaking off in ribbons. Looking GOOD! Do they listen to his voice when he talks? He sounds exhausted. He shuffles around some days like he's a hundred. Just because he says he's fine when you ask, doesn't mean he's telling you the truth. There's so much more that I won't even get into. I realize that people say this to be supportive or positive or whatever. But I hate it. No I'm not saying it would be better if they opened with, "Gosh, Mitch looks like shit!" I can honestly say that I don't know what would be better. I just know that I cannot skip around pretending that things aren't serious or scary or forever different than before cancer. I also know that when I look at him, he doesn't look good. He looks run down and exhuasted and frustrated and worried. How can that look good?

diarrhea

• Stomach cramps
• Loud bubbling noises emanating from my mid-section
• 300 trips to the toilet
• Prayers to the heavens to make it stop
• Adobe mud huts
• Ring of fire

purge

Finally got rid of the random boxes cluttering the guest room.

Highlights of the purge:

• Finding the matches to 3 pairs (yes, three) of Taylor's shoes


• Discovering old, partially eaten sandwich at the bottom of one of the boxes (I blame the girls and yes, it was still in a snap and seal baggie)


• Tossing at least 40 pairs of Mitchell's old underpants without his knowledge


• Being able to walk through the guest room again without the use of a machete